5 tips to help fuel you with more joy and a greater sense of balance

(As featured in Thrive Global)

 

How I created fulfillment after extreme burn out!

After building a thriving business and achieving all the things that I ‘thought’ would bring me happiness, why was I still feeling like something was missing?! It took me years to understand, but I finally figured it out. I was looking for a very different type of success then what i had built. I was looking for fulfillment. Something that cannot be bought. Something created within.

In case someone may be going down a similar path (and would like to avoid burnout – which can be detrimental to your health), I thought I’d share my experience of what steered me back on track.

 

1. What are your passions?

Think about your childhood and what you loved doing before all of the responsibilities came into your life. Make a list of those things. Maybe you stopped doing something of them? Sometimes we feel like it’s selfish to take time for ourselves because our focus should be on our family or priorities at work. But one thing I noticed is that when I started to make time for me and what I love, I felt better! And when I felt better, it was a ripple effect in all the other areas of life. I was a better mother, a happier wife, more productive at work & so on! Doing activities that feed your soul creates fulfillment. 

So what is it that you you love doing? Maybe it’s cooking? Yoga? Make a list of those things. Then check off how many of those things you’re currently doing. What things do you need to let go of, to make space for the new?

 

2. Be your authentic self.

Take ‘should’ out of your vocabulary. Sometimes we get so wrapped up into what others think we should do – career wise. Like being born into a family of doctors and feeling pressure that one should be a doctor too. We spend a huge chunk of our life at work – why not LOVE what we are doing? Everyone is unique. A disease is being somebody we’re not! True fulfillment stems from following our heart. Yes, making difficult decisions about changing careers can be scary. But when we are true to ourselves, we live from our heart (vs. our head) and life becomes easier and more balanced! 

I love this quote:

Working hard for something we don’t care about is called stress. Working hard for something we love is called passion.” ~ Simon Sinek

 

3. How do you FEEL on a day to day basis?

This requires being self aware. We all have an emotional home. And it becomes a habit. Some people find a reason to always worry or complain – so life then becomes “ok” & kills our spirit. We can literally train our minds to be that way. Think about kids and when something exciting happens to them – they are jumping around with joy! We can learn a lot from kids these days & re-train our brain to feel the same emotions!

 

4. Personal Growth

I once learned that comfort is like crack, lol! How true is that?! When we stop growing we start dying inside. If we stay at a job for years (unless it’s one we’re passionate about), we will reach a point where we feel there’s not much else to strive for. And boredom sets in. Pushing ourselves out of our comfort zone, may be scary – but it’s also EXCITING!! When we face limiting beliefs about what we are capable of & conquer them, it’s the most liberating feeling. It’s where fulfillment lies. 

So get comfortable being uncomfortable. Doing that one thing everyday that scares you. The more you push yourself out of your comfort zone, the bigger your comfort zone expands and this becomes your new normal. 

 

5. Contribution

This is a big one and can add so much joy in your life. Find a way to make life about other people. Whether it’s your kids, your spouse, your team, your friends….find a way to serve and help others and your life takes on a whole new meaning! 

When you look at the people in your life, they surround themselves around you because you touch them in some way. What is it that people love about you? How can you make a difference in your own unique way?

 

To health + happiness,

Deborah Xo

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